Tuesday, 30 June 2009

The 80/20 of Life

In most cases, especially in relationships, you will only get 80% of what you NEED and you will hardly get the other 20% that you WANT in your relationship. There is always another person (man or women) that you will meet and that will offer you the other 20% which is lacking in your relationship that you WANT. And believe me, 20% looks really good when you are not getting it at all in your current relationship.

But the problem is that you will always be tempted to leave that good 80% that you know you have, thinking that you will get something better with the other 20% that you WANT. But as reality has proven, in most cases, you will always end up with having the 20% that you WANT and losing the 80% that you really NEED and that you already had.

Be careful in deciding between what you WANT and NEED in your life.

Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have. "Wow, this girl in my office is a real looker. But it's not her Wynona Rider features that got me. I'm crazy about her because she's also understanding, intelligent, tender - so many things that my spouse is not".

Somewhere along the way, you'll find a woman or a man who will be more charming or sensitive. More alluring. More thoughtful. Richer. Have greater sex appeal. And you will find a woman or man who will need you and pursue you and go loco over you more than your spouse ever did.

Because no wife or husband is perfect. Because a spouse will only have 80% of what you're looking for. So adultery takes place when a husband or wife looks for the missing 20%. Let's say your wife is melancholic by nature.

You may find yourself drawn to the pretty clerk who has a cheery laugh no matter what she says: "I broke my arm yesterday, Hahahaha . . .."

Or because your wife is a homebody in slippers and pajamas, smelling of garlic and fish oil, you may fall for a fresh-smelling young sales representative that visits your office in a sharp black blazer, high heels, and a red pencil-cut skirt.

Or because your husband is the quiet type, your heart may skip a beat when you meet an old college flame who has the makings of a talk show host.

But wait! That's only 20% of what you don't have.

Don't throw away the 80% that you already have!

That's not all. Add to your spouse's 80% the 100% that represents all the years that you have been with each other. The storms you have weathered together. The unforgettable moments of sadness and joy as a couple. The many adjustments you have made to love the other. The wealth of memories that you've accumulated as lovers.

Adultery happens when you start looking for what you don't have.

But faithfulness happens when you start thanking God for what you already have.

But I'm not just talking about marriage. I'm talking about life!

About your jobs.

About your friends.

About your children.

About your lifestyles.

Are you like the economy airline passenger that perennially peeks through the door of the first class cabin, obsessed with what he's missing? "They have got more leg room! Oh my, their food is served in porcelain! Wow, their seats recline at an 80% angle and they've got personal videos!"

I guarantee you'll be miserable for the entire trip! Don't live your life like that. Forget about what the world says is first class. Do you know that there are many first class passengers who are miserable in first class -- because they are not riding in a private Lear Jet?

The main message???

If you start appreciating what you have right now, wherever you are, you are first class!

Source unknown.

100% Whiskers

Monday, 29 June 2009

Midget Thai Boxing & Protecting Your Transitions

Somebody emailed me a video of two midgets in a Muay Thai ring, beating the crap out of each other. Aside from the fact that it was demeaning to the midgets (trying to fix my prejudices, but I'm very pessimistic that this wasn't a honourable match to begin with.

Here's the vid.

video

I showed it to a silat master, cikgu Yazid Abdul Rani. After watching it a couple of times, he pointed out something important. In the last KO that the smaller guy delivers, it works because he launches his attack as the other midget tries to step to get closer.

This, in martial arts, is the principle of attacking during transition. In Silat Melayu, it's often called makan gerak, or interception.

This same principle is used in war, to attack the enemy when they are moving between bases, in economy, to attack the shares of a company and effect a takeover when the whole world is beginning to wake up (remember Mahathir's daring Sime Darby dawn raid?) and in romance, when the rebound girl or guy appears just as you're trying to forget your old beau (and often has damaging consequences).

The only way to protect yourself during transition, is to be fully aware of your surroundings, and prepare contingencies every step of the way. Transitions are when you're weakest, because a lot of change is happening all at once. They are the joints (incidentally also the parts of the body most susceptible to attacks) of the situation.

Keep them safe.

Crouching whiskers hiding pizza.

Sunday, 28 June 2009

Actual call centre conversations !!!!!

Call 1:
Unknown
Customer: 'I've been ringing 0800 2100 for two days and can't getthrough to enquiries, can you help?'.
Operator: 'Where did you get that number from, sir?'.
Customer: 'It was on the door to the Travel Centre'..
Operator: 'Sir, they are our opening hours'.

Call 2:
Samsung Electronics
Caller: 'Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?'
Operator: 'I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talkingabout'.
Caller: 'On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly statesthat I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket andtelephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?'
Operator: 'I think you mean the telephone point on the wall'.

Call 3:
RAC Motoring Services
Caller: 'Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I amtravelling in Australia ?'
Operator: ' Doesn't the product name give you a clue?'

Call 4:
Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in France to Faugere): 'If I register my car in France , do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?'

Call 5:
Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
Operator: 'Woven? Are you sure?'
Caller: 'Yes.. That's what it says on the label; Woven in Scotland '.

Call 6:
Tech Support: 'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop'.
Customer: 'OK'.
Tech Support: 'Did you get a pop-up menu?'.
Customer: 'No'.
Tech Support: 'OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'
Customer: 'No'.
Tech Support: 'OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?'.
Customer: 'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote'click''.

Call 7:
This has got to be one of the funniest things in a longtime. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the HelpDesk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for 'Termination without Cause'.

Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now I know why they record these conversations!):

Operator: 'Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?'
Caller: 'Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.'
Operator: 'What sort of trouble??'
Caller: 'Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.'
Operator: 'Went away?'
Caller: 'They disappeared.'
Operator: 'Hmm So what does your screen look like now?'
Caller: 'Nothing.'
Operator: 'Nothing??'
Caller: 'It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.'
Operator: 'Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??'
Caller: 'How do I tell?'
Operator: 'Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??'
Caller: 'What's a sea-prompt?'
Operator: 'Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?'
Caller: 'There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type.'
Operator: 'Does your monitor have a power indicator??'
Caller: 'What's a monitor?'
Operator: 'It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??'
Caller: 'I don't know.'
Operator: 'Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it.. Can you see that??'
Caller: 'Yes, I think so.'
Operator: 'Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: 'Yes, it is.'
Operator: 'When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??'
Caller: 'No.'
Operator: 'Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.'
Caller: 'Okay, here it is.'
Operator: 'Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.'
Caller: 'I can't reach.'
Operator: 'Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??'
Caller: 'No.'
Operator: 'Even if you maybe put your knee on something and leanway over??'
Caller: 'Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle -it's because it's dark.'
Operator: 'Dark??'
Caller: 'Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
Operator: 'Well, turn on the office light then.'
Caller: 'I can't.'
Operator: 'No? Why not??'
Caller: 'Because there's a power failure.'
Operator: 'A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals andpacking stuff your computer came in??'
Caller: 'Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.'
Operator: 'Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.'
Caller: 'Really? Is it that bad?'
Operator: 'Yes, I'm afraid it is.'
Caller: 'Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??'
Operator: 'Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer!!!!!'

Source unknown.

Whiskers on a conf.

Saturday, 27 June 2009

Keirsey Temperament Sorter

The Keirsey Temperament Sorter II (KTS-II) is a free personality test that allows you to understand your social style and gives you suggestions on how you can change your behaviour to manage your social relationships better. Click on the logo above to get your free test.

Amiable-expressive Whiskers.

Friday, 26 June 2009

My advisorant for a friend

we are insan
the arabic word insan comes from the root word meaning 'forget'
we are creatures who forget easily
but because of that

we can experience happiness easily
and not get bored of it

you will pass this way again
and be depressed again

but be content in the fact that after depression is always happiness
and often that happiness is fleeting
and fleeting is good

because it allows us to experience an orgasm of life
it disappears
and then allows us to get down to doing actual serious work most of the time
waiting for the next orgasm of life to pass by
this is life on earth

our qalb, which comes from the arabic word meaning 'change' or 'constant turning'
or 'rotation'
is always changing back and forth
and this is normal

so be content in the fact that it will keep happening
these are the sureties of life
once we realise that they are there
and they repeat themselves
we can be content
that the world
and us

don't change that much over time

My friend

Meowwwrrr.

Thursday, 25 June 2009

The Faithful Wife

A poor grieving widow had to spend the money on her husband's funeral expenseas requested. It was very difficult but she complied with his wishes. What a lucky man to have someone like this in your life. Read her story:

My beloved Jim died.

His will provided $40,000 for an elaborate funeral.

As the last guests departed the affair, his wife Sharon turned to her oldest and dearest friend.

'Well, I'm sure Jim would be pleased,' she said.

'I'm sure you're right,' replied Brenda, who lowered her voice and leaned in close.

'How much did this really cost?'

'All of it,' said Sharon . 'Forty thousand.'

'No!' Brenda exclaimed. 'I mean, it was very nice, but $40,000?'

Sharon answered, 'The funeral was $6,500. I donated $500 to church.

The whiskey, wine and snacks were another $500.

The rest went for the Memorial Stone.'

Brenda computed quickly. '$32,500 for a Memorial Stone?

How big is it?'

Click here to see the Memorial Stone

Source unknown

Whiskers touched.

Thursday, 11 June 2009

Sunday, 7 June 2009

Romantic roads

Last night, I spent 8 grueling hours driving back from Singapore to KL through a jam caused by an accident. I decided to exit the highway and take the old road. The problem is, I've never been on the old road.

I remember back when PLUS just meant tambah and I was a little munchkin and slightly thinner, that driving back to Singapore meant driving along these old roads. It was terribly romantic, as my father drove and I lay down in the back seat watching the trees go by.

The city child that I was, it never occurred to me that driving in a forest was scary or there was such a notion as ghosts. For me, driving at night through those ever winding roads, WAS travelling.

It was only recently that my mother tells me, it was my father's favourite pastime to drive along those curving paths. Unsurprising, since I have inherited his love. As I turned off the highway at Senawang last night, I smiled like a gleeful virgin on his wedding day as I contemplated the dark roads ahead.

I didn't know where I was heading, but the roadsigns that said "Kuala Lumpur" were good enough guidance for me.

I drove all the way through forest to Bangi, reconnected to the main highway and popped up an hour later at home.

Bliss it was.

Whiskers at the wheel.